Limerick: Richard’s Beard

beard1Because it’s amusing, this limerick is geared
To discuss, in detail, Richard Armitage’s Beard.
It’s a point of contention
And so often mentioned
That to compose nothing in its honor would be weird!

 

 

 

beard2A beard is, of course, a matter of taste…
Some women love it, others back away in haste.
When I was younger
I had no beard-hunger
Then I met Hubby, and found my preference replaced.

 

 

 

 

beard3Certainly a beard can hide certain defects…
A weak chin, poor jaw line, or a wart that projects!
Some men, no doubt
Allow a beard to sprout
Because facial hair is such a manly effect.

 

 

beard4Well, we know that Armitage has nothing to hide…
He can show off his chin and his jaw line with pride!
His chiseled lips
Need no manips
As countless admirers will gladly testify.

 

beard5And yet, not every man can wear a beard well…
Sometimes it’s sparse, and that looks like hell!
For a beard to attract
It must in fact
Be full enough not to repel.

 

 

 

beard6An illustration of this, I’m sorry to say
Was the look that we saw when he portrayed Monet.
I thought that wisp
Was a fashion miss
And the chatter must have ruined Richard’s day.

 

beard7That being said, it’s also a fact
That excessively bushy does not attract!
A beard should be shaped
Not to look like an ape
Too much can also detract.

 

 

 


beard8For me, Thorin’s beard does not cross that line…

Though some of the dwarves are too bushy to be fine!
Thorin’s beard is quite full
But it doesn’t read as wool
So most agree when his hotness is opined.

 

beard9Richard is blessed with the ability to grow
A beard in a hurry, as many photos show.
I have to admit
That along with his lips
I love the soul patch that sits just below.

 

 

beard10When Richard expressed the desire to disguise
Proctor’s “weirdbeird” I was surprised
I personally thought
That facial thatch was hot…
And to cover-up with bacon was unwise!

 

 

 

beard11I knew the suggestions that Richard desired
Were a funny diversion, but it was not required!
Proctor’s beard was a work of art
For a Puritan man, he looked stylish and smart!
(Though I eagerly await the photo shoot that transpired.)

 

beard12We haven’t seen much of Dr. Scott White…
Though the selfie from Sleepwalker was quite a sight!
I’m pretty certain
That when they lift the curtain
My desires for the good doctor will ignite!
 

 

 

 

beard13It’s always fun to see what is next…
Will the beard stay or go- the fandom’s obsessed!
When Sleepwalker wrapped
Many admirers clapped
For it appeared that the beard had regressed.

 

beard14Then came a new selfie that seemed to imply:
The beard would be back… the question is why!
Does he just like to tease?
Does wearing a beard now please?
Or does he have a bearded role on standby?

 

 

 

beard15Since I have composed this ode to RA’s facial hair…
One might conclude that I really care!
But that isn’t true
I like him clean-shaven too
In fact, every look he sports causes me to stare!

 

glove beardI contributed to #OneBeardToBringThemAll myself…
@RichardsBeard was on Twitter longer than Richard himself!
Objectively the topic
Is borderline neurotic
But it seems our Beard Speculations are impossible to shelf.

 

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17 comments

  1. vistaborders · November 21, 2014

    I love it!

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      Thank you! Now I’m kicking myself that I posted before #BeardBeGone photos were revealed. LOL

      Like

  2. June · November 21, 2014

    Oh that beard!……love it sometimes and at other times would love to see the whole of that gorgeous face. Thanks for the limerick!

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      I’m a fan of the beard. Can you tell? And a fan of the scruff. And a fan of the clean-shaven. Just a fan of that face no matter what. LOL

      Like

      • June · November 24, 2014

        Preach sister! 😀

        Like

  3. linnetmoss · November 22, 2014

    Hilarious and fun! Thanks for this!

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      Timing was off by a few days. I suppose I could add a couple of stanzas for the #BeardBeGone reveal!

      Like

      • linnetmoss · November 25, 2014

        Perhaps a sorrowful “In Memoriam”? I really enjoyed the beard! It had a life of its own 🙂

        Like

  4. Hariclea · November 22, 2014

    ‘ggg’ lovely beard recap!!! 🙂 thanks for all the ohh and awww worthy reminders :-))) great smiles! 🙂

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      Whether you like the cheesy poetry or not, the pictures of RA are always worth a look! =)

      Liked by 1 person

  5. phylly3 · November 22, 2014

    I even like him in his Monet beard, so I’ve got it bad! Your limericksy odes are fantastic!

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      Really? You do have it bad! Actually, on RA that beard isn’t half bad. On anyone else it would be far worse. He seems to be able to rock just about any look. =)

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Servetus · November 22, 2014

    Servetus’ theory: he doesn’t like the crazy bushy beard, but he also has sensitive skin and doesn’t especially like to shave.

    Liked by 1 person

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      I think you may be on to something. I do have to wonder if he enjoys the beard hype. Maybe it’s grown on him, between the goofy #BeardBeGone business and #OneBeardToBringThemAll he enjoys keeping us guessing. lol

      Liked by 1 person

  7. linda60 · November 23, 2014

    LOL!!! Great rhymes! I’ve never been a fan of beards, but I quite got used to see Mr. Armitage wearing one over the last years… Hypothetical question …could there be a possibilty that once that Man doesn’t look sexy and desirable??

    Like

    • jholland · November 24, 2014

      I’m having a hard time picturing him looking un-sexy or un-desirable. Hypothetically it’s possible, but I can’t envision it.

      Like

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